But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
We had sex on a dog bed..
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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