I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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