Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
