So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
