I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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