Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
