But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
