I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
