Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
You can't special order awesome
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
