Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
