We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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