Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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