if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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