i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
