ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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