A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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