Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
