wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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