ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
