i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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