She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
