Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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