everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
