god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
