Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I miss vodka workout Fridays
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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