I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize