There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
you had me at cake vodka
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize