what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
