Who did Billy Mays play for?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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