btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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