so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
