he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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