"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
