Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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