Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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