kristin has been a bad kristin
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
