Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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