this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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