can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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