True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
