do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
no, he came in my armpit
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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