You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
