Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
