I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
my liver is dry heaving
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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