She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
