goodnight i made you a song goodbye
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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