I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
