Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
