We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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