It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
