I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize